Mumms champagne meet the parents 2000

Champagne Thursdays: You Can Get A Whole Bunch of Mumm's

mumms champagne meet the parents 2000

Mumms champagne meet the parents soundtrack. . The soundtrack album was released on September 26, on the. This meeting is being. G.H. Mumm was the official sponsor of F1 racing from until and provided the 39 years as the headline sponsor of South Africa's major horse race event, The Sun Met. In , René Lalou, the head of the Mumm Champagne House, and . Crown Prince Friedrich, later Friedrich III, stands on his father's right. Meet the Parents is a American dark comedy film written by Jim Herzfeld Greg presents the Byrnes family with a bottle of Mumm's champagne he bought.

In World War II the Old Town was completely destroyed by an air raid of the British air force in ,1, people died, as such, there are few pre-war sights in the centre 5. Napoleon originally created this to ensure political loyalty, the organization would be used as a facade to give political favours, gifts, and concessions.

Napoleon famously declared, You call these baubles, well, it is with baubles that men are led, do you think that you would be able to make men fight by reasoning.

That is good only for the scholar in his study, the soldier needs glory, distinctions, rewards. This has been quoted as It is with such baubles that men are led. The order was the first modern order of merit, under the monarchy, such orders were often limited to Roman Catholics, and all knights had to be noblemen. This decoration, a cross on a sash and a silver star with an eagle, symbol of the Napoleonic Empire, became known as the Grand Aigle.

After Napoleon crowned himself Emperor of the French in and established the Napoleonic nobility inthe title was made hereditary after three generations of grantees. Napoleon had dispensed 15 golden collars of the legion among his family and this collar was abolished in More than 70 million military personnel, including 60 million Europeans, were mobilised in one of the largest wars in history and it was one of the deadliest conflicts in history, and paved the way for major political changes, including revolutions in many of the nations involved.

The war drew in all the worlds great powers, assembled in two opposing alliances, the Allies versus the Central Powers of Germany and Austria-Hungary. These alliances were reorganised and expanded as more nations entered the war, Italy, Japan, the trigger for the war was the assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand of Austria, heir to the throne of Austria-Hungary, by Yugoslav nationalist Gavrilo Princip in Sarajevo on 28 June This set off a crisis when Austria-Hungary delivered an ultimatum to the Kingdom of Serbia.

Within weeks, the powers were at war and the conflict soon spread around the world. On 25 July Russia began mobilisation and on 28 July, the Austro-Hungarians declared war on Serbia, Germany presented an ultimatum to Russia to demobilise, and when this was refused, declared war on Russia on 1 August. Germany then invaded neutral Belgium and Luxembourg before moving towards France, after the German march on Paris was halted, what became known as the Western Front settled into a battle of attrition, with a trench line that changed little until InItaly joined the Allies and Bulgaria joined the Central Powers, Romania joined the Allies inafter a stunning German offensive along the Western Front in the spring ofthe Allies rallied and drove back the Germans in a series of successful offensives.

By the end of the war or soon after, the German Empire, Russian Empire, Austro-Hungarian Empire, national borders were redrawn, with several independent nations restored or created, and Germanys colonies were parceled out among the victors.

During the Paris Peace Conference ofthe Big Four imposed their terms in a series of treaties, the League of Nations was formed with the aim of preventing any repetition of such a conflict.

This effort failed, and economic depression, renewed nationalism, weakened successor states, and feelings of humiliation eventually contributed to World War II. From the time of its start until the approach of World War II, at the time, it was also sometimes called the war to end war or the war to end all wars due to its then-unparalleled scale and devastation.

In Canada, Macleans magazine in October wrote, Some wars name themselves, during the interwar period, the war was most often called the World War and the Great War in English-speaking countries. Will become the first world war in the sense of the word. These began inwith the Holy Alliance between Prussia, Russia, and Austria, when Germany was united inPrussia became part of the new German nation.

The formula, designated in the name, refers to a set of rules, the F1 season consists of a series of races, known as Grands Prix, held worldwide on purpose-built F1 circuits and public roads. The results of each race are evaluated using a system to determine two annual World Championships, one for drivers, one for constructors.

The racing drivers are required to be holders of valid Super Licences, the races are required to be held on tracks graded 1, the highest grade a track can receive by the FIA. Most events are held in locations on purpose-built tracks, but there are several events in city centres throughout the world.

Formula One cars are the fastest road racing cars in the world. The performance of the cars is very dependent on electronics — although traction control and other driving aids have been banned since — and on aerodynamics, suspension, the formula has radically evolved and changed through the history of the sport. F1 had a global television audience of million people during the course of the season.

Grand Prix racing began in and became the most popular internationally in the second half of the twentieth century. The Formula One Group is the holder of the commercial rights. Its high profile and popularity have created a major merchandising environment, since the sports spiraling expenditures and the distribution of prize money favoring established top teams have forced complaints from smaller teams and led several teams to bankruptcy.

The formula is a set of rules that all cars must meet. Formula One was a new formula agreed upon after World War II duringthe first world championship race was held at Silverstone, United Kingdom in A championship for constructors followed innational championships existed in South Africa and the UK in the s and s. Non-championship Formula One events were held for years, but due to the increasing cost of competition 8.

The race is a Grade I stakes race for three-year-old Thoroughbreds at a distance of one, colts and geldings carry pounds and fillies pounds. It is the first leg of the American Triple Crown and is followed by the Preakness Stakes, unlike the Preakness and Belmont Stakes, which took hiatuses in — and —, respectively, the Kentucky Derby has been run every consecutive year since A horse must win all three races to win the Triple Crown, the attendance at the Kentucky Derby ranks first in North America and usually surpasses the attendance of all other stakes races including the Preakness Stakes, Belmont Stakes, and the Breeders Cup.

Meriwether Lewis Clark, Jr. Returning home to Kentucky, Clark organized the Louisville Jockey Club for the purpose of raising money to build quality racing facilities just outside the city, the track would soon become known as Churchill Downs, named for John and Henry Churchill, who provided the land for the racetrack.

Under jockey Oliver Lewis, a colt named Aristides, who was trained by future Hall of Famer Ansel Williamson, won the inaugural Derby, later that year, Lewis rode Aristides to a second-place finish in the Belmont Stakes.

Despite this, the business foundered until when Col.

Matt Winn of Louisville put together a syndicate of businessmen to acquire the facility, under Winn, Churchill Downs prospered and the Kentucky Derby then became the preeminent stakes race for three-year-old thoroughbred horses in North America. Derby participants are limited to three-year-old horses, no horse since Apollo in has won the Derby without having raced at age two.

The three races offered the largest purse and in Sir Barton became the first horse to win all three races, however, the term Triple Crown didnt come into use for another eleven years. Inwhen Gallant Fox became the horse to win all three races, sportswriter Charles Hatton brought the phrase into American usage.

Fueled by the media, public interest in the possibility of a superhorse that could win the Triple Crown began in the leading up to the derby. Two years after the term was coined, the race, which had run in mid-May since inception, was changed to the first Saturday in May to allow for a specific schedule for the Triple Crown races. Sincethe order of Triple Crown races has been the Kentucky Derby first, followed by the Preakness Stakes, prior toeleven times the Preakness was run before the Derby.

It is a 3, metre race for three-year-olds and over and it is the richest two-mile handicap in the world, and one of the richest turf races. The Melbourne Cup has a tradition with the first race held in over two miles but was shortened to 3, metres in when Australia adopted the metric system. This reduced the distance by The race is a quality handicap for horses 3 years old and over, run over a distance of 3, metres, the minimum handicap weight is 50 kg.

There is no weight, but the top allocated weight must not be less than 57 kg. The weight allocated to each horse is declared by the VRC Handicapper in early September, the Melbourne Cup race is a handicap contest in which the weight of the jockey and riding gear is adjusted with ballast to a nominated figure.

Older horses carry more weight than younger ones, and weights are adjusted according to the horses previous results. Around to horses are nominated each year, but the field is limited to 24 starters. Leger Tenno Sho Sankei Sho All Comers Arlington Million San Juan Capistrano Handicap Australian Stayers Challenge The limitation of 24 starters is stated explicitly to be for safety reasons, however, in the past far larger numbers were allowed - the largest field ever raced was 39 runners in International horses that are entered for the Melbourne Cup must undergo quarantine in a premises in their own country for a minimum period of 14 days before travelling to Australia.

He is the first person to both the metres and metres world records since fully automatic time became mandatory. He is the world and Olympic champion in these three events. Due to his dominance and achievements in sprint competition, he is widely considered to be the greatest sprinter of all time. He gained worldwide popularity for his double sprint victory at the Beijing Olympics in world record times, Bolt is the only sprinter to win Olympic m and m titles at three consecutive olympics, a feat referred to as the triple double.

He is the most successful athlete of the World Championships and was the first athlete to win three titles in both the m and m at the competition. Bolt improved upon his first m world record of 9. He has twice broken the metres world record, setting Bolts most successful event is the m, with three Olympic and four World titles, the Olympics was his international debut over m, he had earlier won numerous m medals and holds the world under and world under records for the event. Bolt has stated that he intends to retire from athletics after the World Championships.

As a child, Bolt attended Waldensia Primary, where he first began to show his sprinting potential, by the age of twelve, Bolt had become the schools fastest runner over the metres distance. Upon his entry to William Knibb Memorial High School, Bolt continued to focus on other sports, pablo McNeil, a former Olympic sprint athlete, and Dwayne Jarrett coached Bolt, encouraging him to focus his energy on improving his athletic abilities.

The school had a history of success in athletics with past students, Bolt won his first annual high school championships medal intaking the silver medal in the metres with a time of Performing for Jamaica in his first Caribbean regional event, Bolt clocked a personal best of California wine — California wine is wine made in the U. Almost three quarters the size of France, California accounts for nearly 90 percent of American wine production, the production of wine in California alone is one third larger than that of Australia.

If California were a country, it would be the worlds fourth largest wine producer. The states viticultural history dates back to the 18th century when Spanish missionaries planted the first vineyards to produce wine for Mass, today there are more than 1, wineries in the state, ranging from small boutique wineries to large corporations with distribution around the globe.

The grapes association with the church caused it to known as the Mission grape. Yeah, I left him here when I moved to Chicago. Your daddy's found his new best friend. You won't believe it. He even taught him to use the potty. Dad, that's kinda weird, isn't it? Now we don't have to smell kitty litter all the time. How did you teach the cat to use the toilet? Oh, that was easy, Greg.

I just designed a litter box to put inside the toilet, and then once he got used to it, I took it away. But I don't think he likes it. I mean, every chance he gets, he tries to dig, squat and bury. I had to move all my potted plants off the floor. Plus, you got another guy around the house to leave the seat up. He can't lift the seat, Greg. He lacks the strength and the opposable thumbs.

Opposable-- I didn't think about that. Jinx is strictly a house cat. Can't let him outside because he lacks outdoor survival skills. One of those things, isn't it, sweetheart? I don't think Greg will be playing with Jinxy too much. I don't-- I don't hate cats. I just happen to be more of a dog lover.

Well, that's okay if you hate cats, Greg. I don't hate cats at all. Just be honest about it. There's some things I hate. I-- I'm being honest. Honey, why don't we let the kids freshen up, huh? Greg, you come with me. We'll get you something to wear from Jack's closet, okay? Oh, honey, honey, honey, honey.

Hey, listen, be nice to this one, okay? I kinda like him. Shirt fit okay, Greg? Tom Collins coming up. Yeah, but you didn't have to tell them right when we met. It just kinda slipped out. Get your red-hot papooses. My goodness, what is that? Oh, that's just a little something from me. Look, honey, Greg brought us a present. Oh, isn't that nice? Oh, look at this. It's a flower pot with the dirt in it.

The bulb of a Jerusalem tulip. Which I was told is one of the rarest and most beautiful flowers in existence. Oh, right, right, the Jerusalem-- From the "Jerusales tulipesias" genus. Anyway, yeah, the guy said with regular watering, it should bloom in about six months, so-- Oh, we'll look forward to that, Greg. I, uh, I recently got transferred to triage. Oh, is that better than a nurse? No, Mom, triage is a unit of the E.

It's where all the top nurses work. Well-- No, they do. No, Jack, not traditionally. Oh, Pam, honey, did you know that your father started his own business? Yes, I thought with my knowledge and experience, why should I allow retirement to stop me? I really admire that. So what is it?

What's the new venture? Let me ask you a question, Greg. Let's just say you have kids So, you hire a baby-sitter, someone you think you can trust. References, work experience-- it all checks out fine. But then how do you really know for certain I mean, can you ever really trust another human being, Greg? Sure, I think so.

No, the answer is you cannot. Let me show you something. Take a look at this, Greg. What's this look like to you? Um-- [Squeaks] This looks like a teddy bear. Smile, you're on "Nanny Camera.

I've seen these things advertised on TV. Oh, no, not like this, you haven't. Where's the other camera? Right here in this decorative artifact. Our cameras are motion-activated, so they begin taping as soon as they sense any movement. We can hide 'em in anything. We hide 'em in mirrors, lamps, televisions, you name it. So no matter where you go, we'll be watching you. You know, invasion of privacy? Trust me, Greg, when you start having little Fockers running around, you'll understand the need for this level of protection.

Honey, I'll get it. Any problem with the documents? I'll meet you at the Oyster Bay Drugstore in about minutes. Now you gotta be more careful when you call here. If anybody else answers, just use a Southern accent We're all out of Collins mix, so I'm gonna make a run for the store.

I thought I just bought some. You know how that stuff-- it just goes, so I'll be back in a jiff. Well, why doesn't Greg go with you? Sweetie, you'll need something in case your suitcase doesn't show up. You don't wanna take a chance. You don't have a toothbrush. Okay, unless you want some privacy.

Why would I need privacy?

mumms champagne meet the parents 2000

No, I didn't think you would. Okay, let's head out. Have fun, you guys. Pam, he seems wonderful. We have the best time together. Now, have you two been mm, mm, mm? Oh, thinking about anything permanent. Oh, I don't know. I mean, we haven't really discussed it, but I definitely have a feeling this is it.

This car is-- You got-- What do you use? Hey, you know, Jack, now that we have a second to talk, I just want you to know how much Pam means to me. I know-- I know that we haven't been together that long, but the time that we have spent together has been really incredible. Greg, how come you don't like cats? I don't not like cats.

I-l just-- I just prefer dogs. I mean, I'm just more of a dog kind of, you know-- Come home, wagging their little tails, happy to see you kind of-- You need that assurance? You prefer an emotionally shallow animal? I-- You see, Greg, when you yell at a dog, his tail will go between his legs and cover his genitals, his ears will go down. A dog is very easy to break, but cats make you work for their affection.

You like Peter, Paul and Mary? I'm a big fan. Puff the magic dragon Dragon Lived by the sea Great song. Yeah, one of my favorites. Who would've thought it wasn't really about a dragon, huh? No, I don't know. Why don't you tell me? Some people think that Well, Puff's just the name of the boy's magical dragon. Are you a pothead, Focker? No, no, no, no, Jack. No, I'm-- I'm not-- I-- I pass on grass all the time. I mean, not all the time.

Yes or no, Greg? Hey, Greg, I'll meet you back out front in about Do you have any of those nicotine patches? We have the gum.

And what's your most expensive bottle of champagne? It's on sale for. You can get a whole bunch of Mumm's. I've been ready, yeah. They ran out of Collins mix. I grew up on a farm. Dankeschoen Get your hot buns, hot patooties.

Wow, Dina, everything looks fabulous. It's such a treat for me to have a home-cooked meal like this. Dinner at my house usually consisted of everybody in the kitchen What, there wasn't enough food to go around?

We just never really sat down like a family like this. Oh, uh, well, Greg's Jewish, Dad. You're telling me Jews don't pray, honey? Unless you have some objection. No, no, no, no, I'd love to. Pam, come on, it's not like I'm a rabbi or something. I said grace at many a dinner table.

O dear God, thank You. You are such a good God to us, a kind and gentle And we thank You, Osweet, sweet Lord of hosts You have so aptly lain at our table this day Day by day by day. O dear Lord, three things we pray. To love Thee more dearly, to see Thee more clearly, to follow Thee more nearly Oh, Greg, that was lovely.

That was interesting too. Oh, that's a-- that's a lovely vase. Let me guess, Jack. Is that one of your secret cameras too? Greg, that's an urn which holds the remains of Jack's mother. You didn't know, Greg. I'm-- That's our Gran-gran. We like to think of her as watching over us as we eat. Miss you every day. Oh, honey, why don't you read Greg your poem? Oh, no, he doesn't want to hear that. You see, when Jack had to retire The doctor thought it would be therapeutic if he Honey, you wrote the most beautiful poem about your mother.

Please, we really wanna hear it. It's a work in progress. I'm still not happy with it. As soon as it's ready, then I am going to glaze it onto a plate So-So-- So much love, yet also so much information.

Greg, would you like some yams? You must've had vegetables fresher than that, growing up on a farm, Greg.

Dad, uh, Greg grew up in Detroit. He told me he grew up on a farm. In fact, Jack, I should clarify this. I didn't actually grow up The house we grew up in was originally erected So that, plus we had a lot of pets-- - Which one did you milk then? Honey, he said he pumped milk. What have you ever milked?

I milked a cat once. You wanna hear a story? My sister had a cat, and the cat birthed a litter of kittens. Must've been of them, and there was this one little runt I went in and just simply, you know, just-- into a little saucer, then took the saucer and fed it to Geppetto-- that's what I named him. I had-- I had no idea you could milk a cat.

Oh, yeah, you can milk anything with nipples. I have nipples, Greg. Could you milk me? Okay, could we change the subject perhaps? I thought maybe we could celebrate with a little bubbly. Can you milk me? Would anybody care for a bottle of Oyster Bay Drug and Sundries finest champagne?

Meet The Parents Script - transcript from the screenplay and/or Ben Stiller movie

That is so sweet of you, Greg. Isn't that a nice gesture? How could I have seen Debbie's ring, Mom? Well, when I gave Bob the okay to propose to Deb, I put him in touch with my diamond guy, and he picked out the same design Kevin gave you.

Kevin, your old boyfriend? Well, yeah, Kevin was Pam's fianc? Greg, sweetie, how you doing? Oh, just fine, considering I desecrated your grandma's remains, found out you were engaged and had your father ask me to milk him.

At least back then he was still talking to me. I can't believe you didn't tell me you were that close. Who, Daddy and me? No, Kevin and you. Do we have to know everything about each other's pasts? You never told me about your cat-milking days in Motown. That was a long time ago, Pam. Yeah, okay, well, so was this. Kevin's and my connection was more physical than anything else.

Like you worked out together? No, no, it was nothing, nothing. It was a stupid sexual thing. I'm gonna go throw up now. Kevin and I were only engaged for a month before I realized that I'd made a mistake, okay?

mumms champagne meet the parents 2000

I-l-l gave back the ring, I moved to Chicago, and I met and fell in love with you, okay, so can we please drop this? I just feel like this is not going well at all. I feel like your dad hates me.

He doesn't hate you, sweetie. Just give him a chance, all right? Maybe he's nervous too, huh? I thought he would love my gift, you know, being this big flower guy, but it's like he didn't even show the slightest bit of interest.

You are the most adorable, loving, sweetest man in the whole world, and I love you. And very soon my parents are gonna see that Speaking of growing to love you-- Honey, it's late. I know it's late. Winky is still on Chicago time, and we both know there's only one way to make Mr. What's with the robe? My pajamas are in the suitcase with everything else. Hey, I'll lend you a pair of Jack's. You don't have to do that, Dina.

Look, Greg, I just wanna say, don't worry about what happened tonight. Still, I feel horrible. I mean-- Well, it was a horrible thing. But let's just put all that behind us and enjoy our weekend together. These'll do just fine. See you in the morning. Have a nice sleep. Oh, no, no, no, Greg, we made up the pullout for you down in the den. Oh, okay, 'cause Pam said I should sleep in Debbie's room. Well, Debbie'll be sleeping here tomorrow. This way, you'll have more privacy, you'll have your own bathroom.

Just try not to flush the toilet. It's always a little quirky. I understand it's the st century, and you've probably had premarital relations with my daughter.

But under our roof, it's my way or the Long Island Expressway. Keep your snake in its cage for hours. At Atlantic American Airways, customer satisfaction always comes first.

We are experiencing heavy call volume. Your call is very important to us. It will be answered in approximately minutes. Please press " " if you'd like to talk to a representative. Please call back-- Oh! I don't know what it is, but there's just something about him that's a little off. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Jack, you know we've been through this I think Greg-- he's a lovely young man.

And, honey, Pam thinks he might be the one. She said those exact words? I didn't tape record it, Jack, but that's the impression. What kind of a family doesn't have time to sit down for dinner? Please try to enjoy the weekend, honey. Both our daughters are in love. That's what I'm worried about. Oh, geez, I just realized something. Looking for something, Greg? Jesus, Jack, you scared me. I heard a noise, so I came down to see if everything was okay. I just-- I'm sorry.

I saw a light on, and I kinda stumbled in. I didn't realize-- That's okay. No, not at all. I mean, I mean-- I mean, this is great, though. I love this-- what you-- it's a cozy little nook. I noticed you were looking at that when I came in. It's an antique polygraph machine. Is that what that is? I've seen these before, but I never saw one actually up close. Why don't you try that on? We'll have some fun. I'll show you how it works.

You have nothing to hide. They're-- You'd be surprised how accurate they are. They can tell fairly easily if someone's lying or not. Now I'm gonna ask you some questions, and all you have to do is answer "yes" or "no. Let's give it a whirl. Did you fly on an airplane today? No, it was rare. It was a little rare for my taste. The needles are jumping. Have you ever watched pornographic videos? No, no, I'm just going over some of my answers from the polygraph test your dad gave me.

Well, did you lie to him? I mean-- Well, he asked me if we were living together, and-- What'd you tell him? Your mother walked in Is this how you'd react if I told you he shoved bamboo shoots up my fingernails?

Or does he hook all your boyfriends up to his little machine? Well, he doesn't need a machine. He's a human lie detector. Greg, my father was never in the rare flower business. That was just his cover. He was in the C. How could you not tell me this?

I wanted to, honey, but it was strictly He's in the C. He was a spy? He is a spy? No, he was more like a psychological profiler. They used him to interrogate suspected double agents in the company.

I was scared of your dad back when I thought he was a florist. It's wonderful to know that I've actually got a C. You're doing great, okay? This is a lot to take in, honey. Oh, I know, but you're doing fine. I'm not supposed to let the snake out of my cage. I told your dad I wouldn't touch you for hours. Okay, I'm not in junior high anymore, so-- No, no, no. I want to try to respect his rules, okay? Uh, why don't you go ahead and get some sleep, and I'll see you in the morning.

Pam told me she let you in on a little secret of mine last night. Well, as long as you can keep your mouth shut for the rest of your life, you're in no immediate danger. I'm just being humorous. But the fact is, Greg, with the knowledge you've been given, you are now on the inside of what I like to call Let's go inside and have breakfast.

Not at the table, honey, please. You must be Greg. Nice 'do, nice 'do. I'll do the intros. Greg, this is my sister, Debbie. Nice to meet you.

Oh, the bride to be. You can call me Bob Whoa, now, cut that out. You know, Greg's in medicine, too, Larry. Hey, why don't I get you a chair, Greg? So, you didn't want to go for the M. No, I actually thought about becoming a doctor, but I decided it wasn't for me. Oh, he did more than okay. Why did you take the test if you weren't planning on going to med school? Well, I wanted to keep my options open, but in the end, nursing was a better fit for me.

It gives you the freedom to work in several different areas of medicine. Wasn't your friend Andy supposed to be here by now? I thought Deb told you. Andy threw out his back. He can't make the wedding. Now I have to reconfigure the whole procession. Um, Bob, why doesn't Greg stand in for Andy, be the usher? Bob, Greg'll be your second usher. Yeah, yeah, okay, sure. Let's all finish up and get ready to go In that case, I'd better get upstairs Dina, thank you so much for breakfast.

Why didn't you wake me up? Don't worry about it. Tell that to Dr. Torquemada in there with the Grand Inquisition. Go take a shower, get dressed and come back down.

No, I don't-- Come on. I just-- No, I don't feel comfortable wearing your dad's underwear. Okay, well, go wake up Denny and borrow some of his. You want me to go wake up your brother who I never met Top of the stairs, turn right. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey! What the hell you doing in here? I'm-- I'm Greg, Pam's friend. Were you just sniffing my boxers, dude? No, no, she said I could come up here, maybe borrow some clothes from you. Do me a favor. Yeah, so, it's all good. Dad keeps you guys under a pretty close watch, huh?

No, it's not that bad. Your little Pamcake's got it a lot worse than I do. You need some clothes. Yes, that would be-- that would be great. Glad to hook you up. Like what you done with the crib. Yeah, I think these ought a do it. All right, here you go, chief. Thanks a lot, Denny. Oh, and don't worry about the little covert op, all right? I'll keep it on the lowdown. Larry, Linda, Debbie, Bob, honey. Now, I'm gonna activate the alarm. It'll go off in T minus seconds. I don't think I need a jacket.

It's cold out, honey. Here, take Denny's jacket. Hey, Denny, I'm lending Greg your jacket, okay? Denny, how's the tux fit? Dad, uh-- What's that? I-It's a sculpture I found in Greg's jacket. This isn't a sculpture, Denny. This is a device for smoking marijuana. I like the top hat. Can I talk to you for a minute? Did I not clearly explain the circle of trust to you, Greg?

Mm, yeah, I think I got it. Then is there something you wanna tell me? Mm, l-l don't think so. Didn't we have a discussion yesterday in the car about this?

You mean me and Pam. Yes, I would love to talk to you about that. We're not talking about Pam. We're talking about you. See, if I can't trust you, Greg, then I have no choice And once you're out, you're out. There's no coming back.

Mm, well, I would definitely like to stay inside the circle. Well, then, tell me the truth. Jack, I don't know what we're talking about. All right, now look, Focker, I'm a patient man. That's what months in a Vietnamese prison camp will do to you. But I will be watching you, studying your every move. And if I find that you are trying to corrupt my firstborn child, I will bring you down, baby. I will bring you down to Chinatown.

I thought we were going to Kevin's house. This is Kevin's new house. Oh, this is a crazy house. Not bad, huh, Dad? Maybe he uses marijuana for medicinal purposes. People do that nowadays. Honey, this kid has been lying to us from the moment we met him.

Get in some quality time with the boys? Uh-huh, yeah, it was fun. Listen, I hope this lunch isn't too weird for you. Q at Best Man's" be weird? I was sure I told you. Kevin is Bob's best man. This is his place. How does he know Bob? I was really lucky I was able to salvage this wood Kevin, the house is amazing.

This is where Maybe you should have gotten married here.

G. H. Mumm

All right, the sun is out, the grill is hot and the pool is luke. If I can interest you in a swim and a little B. Q, just follow me. It must cost a fortune to heat this place.

I don't know why I thought you knew. It-- It's not a big deal. If I can handle a weekend without sex and cigarettes, I think I can handle an afternoon with your ex-fianc?

Now, for the floor that you're walking on, I chose this Bolivian wormwood. I think it works well in here. I have the Viking range here and the twin Sub-Z's. Yeah, they open up right there. Oh, I get it. Yeah, kind of blend in. Are you a homeowner, Greg? No, no, I rent.

So, things are going real, real well for you, aren't they, eh, Kevo? Gosh, things have been going so great lately.

I got in early on some wireless I. What line of work are you in? There are a lot of Benjamins to be made now with biotech stuff. I don't have to tell you that.

You gotta strike while the iron's hot.

Meet the Parents (2000) Scene: "I milked a cat once."

That's great to give something back like that. I'd love to find time to do volunteer work. Just the other day I saw this golden retriever that-- He had like a gimp, and he couldn't really-- It made me feel terrible.

I wish there was something I could do. Yeah, well, I get paid, but also it feels, you know, good too. So it's kind of an everybody wins. What are you-- You're like a Wall Street trader? I mean, I'm willing to be painted with that brush. Yes, that's my day job. We got time, don't we, Jack?

I want to show you what I'm really interested in. It looks like somebody got an "A" in wood shop. I whittled that out of beech wood. So what got you into, uh, "carpentering"? He was a carpenter, and I just figured if you're gonna follow in someone's footsteps, who better than Christ? You're in good company. Well, I'm gonna head to the pool, but why don't you show Greg and Pam the gift?

I put a fresh coat of lacquer on this this morning, so bear with me with the fumes. The little holes are for candles. And then later, they'll collect rainfall. Or you might call it a "ho-puh. I'm gonna take it over to the Byrneses', and tomorrow Robert and Debra will meet beneath it to become man and wife. And later, when they purchase a home, maybe it will grace their garden.

Well, that's my sappy, romantic idea. No, not too bad. Which isn't bad, considering I carved it all by hand from one piece of wood. Time to start the barbecue, big guy. I better get back to playing host. Okay, you guys, grab your suits, and I'll meet you down at the pool. I don't even have a suit with me. The airline lost my bag and-- [Jack] Pamcake, let's go.

Mom's got your suit here. You better get going. And, by the way, she just had the nicest things to say about you. Yeah, we had some good times together. Boy, she is a tomcat. So, let me hook you up with some trunks, Gregger. I'm not gonna swim.